Mike Patrick is a Joke
nickev | Feb 12, 2009 | Comments 8
How does this man get prime-time jobs like the North Carolina-Duke game? I tuned in last night and nearly turned it off when I realized he was teaming up with Dickie V to call the game. He is an absolute joke, a homer and for goodness sake button up your shirt because you look like an absolute slob. When they gave a close-up shot of him and Vitale he looked like he had just got done making out with Coach K.
On to the game last night, we all know that Mike Patrick slurps up on Duke more than Lloyd Christmas slurps up on his slurpie. So we knew what was coming.
The Pukies got off to a slow start and North Carolina jumped out to an early lead. You could hear the disappointment in Patrick’s voice. But then Carolina stopped playing defense and Puke made it’s run. They went on a 22-5 run towards the end of the first half, making 9-of-11 shots. The Tar Heels were held to two field goals in the final 7 1/2 minutes and Duke took a 52-44 lead to half.
During this run I am pretty sure Mike Patrick blew his wad at least five times. Everytime Duke hit a three he had to run to the bathroom to clean up and when Paulus tied up Thompson underneath I’m pretty sure he tried to get on the court so he could pleasure him right there.
It’s sick. It really is sick listening to Mike Patrick do Duke games. Seriously, one reason why J.J. Redick has not had much success in the NBA is because it is really tough to compete in the Association with Mike Patrick’s tongue stuck to your jewels.
In the second half when the Tar Heels decided to play defense and Ty Lawson figured out that he could get to the rim whenever he wanted, Patrick was silenced. When Duke is not playing well he has absolutey nothing to say. How do you get more enthusiastic on a Paulus tie-up then you do some of Lawson’s drives. And then Lawson comes down with an offensive rebound, amongst the trees, and he gets no kind of props.
Mike Patrick sucks. Duke sucks. ESPN please take this slob off of your rotation. How do you have Dan Shulman and Sean McDonough on the pine for this one? I don’t care if Jon Sciambi is doing the game. Anyone, but the biggest Duke slurper of all, Mike Patrick.
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as parlayed to yourself and Rolf last night, Mike Patrick is the number one catalyst pushing me to vomit, swish around the chunks, gargle and swallow it back down. It is truly a disturbing thing to watch/listen to.
If ESPN doesn’t fire him for his Duke love, they should at least fire him for this:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5pfs6LNk7Po&feature=related
with five minutes left in first half the man called it the greatest game he’d ever seen. In the middle of Dick V tellin’ a story bout somethin Scheyer hits a meaningless baseline jumper and Patrick can’t contain his excitement as he interrupts Dick to scream “SCHEYER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” that was his whole call. oh and bout five minutes in he makes some remark about how he just felt like Scheyer was gonna have a HUGE impact on the game. Yeah real huge, got their @$$e$ beat. Hate Patrick. Hate Puke. Oh and hilarious moment was when they showed Bob Stoops. Dickie V had genuine excitement and surprise… “OOOOOOHHH!!! LOOKIE THERE!!!!! ITS STOOPSIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OOOOH!!!!!!!!” gotta be kiddin’ me wif these nuts.
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[...] (color) calling the action. Ugh! To read all you need to know about the play-by-play man, check out Wink’s thoughts on Mr. Patrick. You can also hear the game broadcast on WKRD (790 AM, 101.7 FM) (joined in progress [...]
His worst was when he called JJ Redick the greatest shooter who ever lived.
ESPN should be ashamed to have Duke Vitale and Patrick do Duke games together.
[...] mater. Louisville, picked to finish next to last in the conference (ahead of only Syracuse — Greg Paulus can’t really QB with Mike Patrick swingin from his jock), looked like the same team it has [...]
Not just Duke games. Any game, in any sport, is reduced to unendurable experience when this idiot is at the mic. I am constantly amazed that this guy knows absolutely nothing about basketball. Nothing. He needs to be sent to the Old Idiot’s Home, where he can drink highballs in his rocking chair and think about blowing Tim Tebow.