There. Is. No. Way!!! Top 13 Hot Girl With Ugly Guy Couples
Carl H | Sep 28, 2009 | Comments 28
There is no way!!! A phrase uttered by us all upon seeing the gigantic douchebag/ratface that a ridiculously hot girl is for some reason (see $$$ in 99.8 % of all cases) with. We have pontificated this topic several times here on the Pinkie, see our ‘This Does This – Explain It?‘ and ‘Hot and Not‘ posts. There is even an entire website dedicated to hot chicks with douchebags. That would be the cleverly named, hotchickswithdouchebags.com.
Well whilst watching former Yump Kaley Cuoco tonight on the awesome show, Chuck Lorre and CBS’ Big Bang Theory, I was once again forced to believe she was ever interested in her across the hall neighbor, Leonard aka David from Roseanne fame.
I guess it must be possible, how else could you explain this list of the Top 13 Hot Girls With Ugly Guys??
13. Beyonce + Jay-Z – Nasir Jones pretty much summed this one up with his description of the Jigga man on the diss track “Ether”:
“What you think, you getting girls now ’cause of your looks?
Ne-gro please
You no mustache having, with whiskers like a rat
Compared to Beans you wack.”
12. Julia Roberts + Lyle Lovett – David Letterman’s All-Time number one hooked up with a man actually uglier than him, which has to give him some hope. This one kind of makes sense to me, they both have horse faces.
11. Pamela Anderson + Kid Rock – Given, Pam is pretty screwed up and obviously has her type down, but for cryin’ out loud, it’s Robert James Ritchie!!!
10. Shania Twain + Mutt Lange – Shania Twain is Sssssssmokin’ hot. Mutt Lange, well his real name is Robert John Lange… the nickname “Mutt” ain’t a coincidence.
9. Marilyn Monroe + Joe DiMaggio and Arthur Miller – Possibly the greatest sex icon in American History chose two of the ugliest mofos ever as her second and third husbands, respectively. I kinda understand Joe, he was the Yankee Clipper… but big Art Miller? He was a friggin’ playwright!!
8. Olivia Wilde and Padma Lakshimi + Salman Rushdie – This one should probably be a little higher based on looks differential alone, but I gotta give some props to my man Salman. I mean (1) who the hell are you? and (2) what the hell did you do to get loaded rich/famous to be able to pull this caliber of broads?
7. Mila Kunis + Maccaulay Culkin – Kevin McCallister has somehow, someway pulled Jackie Burkhart. I just don’t understand. Here, courtesy of Wikipedia, is where Maccaulay’s career is at today: On August 17, 2009, Culkin made a brief cameo appearance on WWE RAW at the Scottrade Center in St. Louis, Missouri, following a “falls count anywhere” match between Hornswoggle and Chavo Guerrero in which Guerrero was defeated by the classic Home Alone gag of rigging a swinging paint can to hit him upon opening a door. Culkin appeared in the doorway and said, “That’s not funny.”
6. Kate Hudson + Chris Robinson – Apparently ladies love rock stars. Robinson is the lead singer of The Black Crowes and 13 years Hudson’s elder. But The Crowes did churn out the hits like “Hard To Handle” and “She Talks To Angels” on their way to selling over 20 million albums. Still these two together is a bit hard for me to handle.
5. Natalie Portman + Devendra Banhart – Uh, who??
4. Jennifer Lopez + Marc Anthony – Come on! You’re Jenny from the block. You were probably the most desirable women on the planet for two or three years strong. And this is what you settle with? Probably had something to do with some form of self punishment for the awfulness that was Gigli.
3. Adriana Lima + Marko Jaric – Adriana, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!?!? You almost get a pass because Marko is somehow an NBA player, but other than Sam Cassell or Chris Kaman, you got the bottom of the barrel — and you’re a Victoria’s Secret SUPERMODEL!!!!!! Ugh.
2. Christina Aguilera + Jordan Bratman – This one could easily be at the top spot given the massive gap in attractiveness between the scorching Aguilera and the flickering Bratman. Maybe Christina was hammered and thought she was marrying the “Bartman” instead??
1. Heidi Klum + Seal – If you need any explanation I again refer you to our previous feature: ‘This Does This – Explain It?‘
Welp, there you have it. Feel free to disagree on the order, or the list, but I think we can all agree that THERE. IS. NO. WAY!!!!!!!
"HAHA! You Will Never Understand!!!"
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sorry, I don’t get it
Good deal. I like her music a lot. It actually irritates me when individuals say things like since she’s Forty she shouldn’t create music anymore. Thats nonsense. Bring it J.Lo!
Hmm..I think Chris Robinson is sexy. Especially in that pic. Looks like 1970 John Lennon. And whoever is with Natalie Portman is sexy also, in my opinion
Haha, some of these guys aren’t ugly and some of these girls definitely aren’t hot.
devendra is king, portman is the less he can have
50% of those guys aren’t ugly at all. The fat guy is ugly becuz of his fat, but jay-z, seal, devendra, chris robinson, kid rock are okay or better…
and most of the others are just old.
though it’s a question of taste, of course ^^
Hey pretty girls and gilt guys do not mix ewwwww
Maybe they just have game and great personalities and that’s what these women are after. What is wrong with that? Stop busting their balls you jealous haters.
wow Mark you are pretty ugly 4 J lo but I think you guys make a perfect match.
[...] was super hot and after she was crazy. That’s a weird combination. If you want more proof, see hot chicks with douchebags. Still, I’m betting ‘Ol Billy Bob was riding the wave of one of the other two of the Big Three [...]
How can you possibly leave of the biggest of them all…Paulina Porizkova and Rick Okasek? And what the hell is Natalie Portman doing with an assembly line hipster douchebag like that ?!?!
Who is Salman Rushdie? he wrote what is considered one of the greatest novels of the 20th century- ‘midnights children’. To me that is far more impressive than how someone looks.
That’s how most bitches roll nowadays. They are soo careful about getting the wrong guy And are obsessed with looks but they are women. They contradict themselves everywhere they go. Fucking goldigging bitches. I don’t give a shit about any of these couple but Adriana Lima fucked up pretty bad here. This guys looks like a fucking alien. Look at his face I swear my shit looks better.
@sarah. are you fucking stupid bitch? he writes a book so you suck his dick? your a 2 dollar whore an just justified what “tray” said. you have no self respect and low standards. suck my dick too bitch i wrote the worlds greatest book
@Daniel. game personality…perhaps but i think its more than that. women are fucking tricky, you dont know them enough. No body is hating its just these people are ugly as fuck and these hot ass chicks “settled” for less. Fuck that there are good looking guys out there that fit the description of the perfect guy but these bitches are fucking stupid
Just a note to all you bitches, you walk around rating guys in your head based on appearance but you “settle” for these ugly motherfuckers. If thats the case then you should stop wasting your time and our time and just suck every guy’s dick in the world…hot or ugly cuz theres really nopoint for the masquerade. All those ugly people need love too and you just “looking” for the hot guy doesn’t help if you are gonnna fuck the ugly guy.
Sorry but Seal is freakin hot!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Just goes to show, it’s now how you look, it’s how you treat them.
All of the ugly guys are rich and famous …that s what attracted the women
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I think Seal is pretty hot, he’s super fit and he’s much more handsome than Jay-Z. You only put him at the top of the list because of the scars, but they don’t bother me actually they give him a mystery aura which is kinda hot.
I don’t think the girls are chasing the man’s wealth because they themselve are wealthy. And guy who is jealous with these ugly guy with hot girl, will just say its because they’re rich just to comfort their own self on why they are not dating these hot girls. Guys, if you got looks but still you’re not dating hot girls, you sucks man. Dont get jealous of this ugly guys.
Money and power > the main reason. Women don’t give a crap if a guy is good looking. They always pick a monstrous douchebag over a cool dude with great personality. Tray and alex are 100% right about this.
These girls don’t want tricky dicky handsome men. They probably have had bad experience with hot jerks, so now they prefer men who are easily predictable.
They pick ugly assholes over nice guys with awesome qualities, well, at least in my country. Very shameful indeed
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